Depression (Not Alone)
I can still remember that numbness, waking up everyday, hoping maybe something will happen that ends this. Time’s been ticking along for too long, and…
… you still
haven’t
moved.
Laying on the floor… numb.
It feels like…
… everyone else’s life is going just fine. Everyone else is moving along, but you…
you’re not moving.
You haven’t moved for some time. You’re still caught up in rules. You’re caught up in loss. You’re still caught up in shame, and you’re still confused. You don’t even know why.
You’re different, or at least you feel that way.
Everyone else…
… is moving.
EVERYONE,
else,
is
moving…
… But you’re still stuck here.
Broken.
What the hell happened?
When did this take a turn for the worse?
Why can I not get past this?
EVERYONE ELSE… is moving.
What do I want?
… I don’t even know what I want.
I guess I just want to start moving.
I don’t want to stay stuck.
I wanna join the crowd, or break free from it… I still haven’t decided on that.
Everyone else…
… is moving;
I first encountered depression at the age of 22 after my first knee surgery. In hindsight, I really think something changed in my brain chemistry after that surgery, and the 2nd, and the 3rd. Something happens when your body experiences any type of trauma.
… or maybe that was just a trigger for me. At age 25/26 it hit me worse. I didn’t even want to be around. I just felt empty & less than everyone else around me. It felt like I was the only one who didn’t have this life thing figured out, or pieced together.
… But you know what? There’s power in speaking. There’s power in sharing. There’s power in knowing that I’m not the only one. I’m one of many who’ve experienced and suffered through depression for all kinds of reasons.
“So for all of you out there who are depressed, know that there is light at the end of the tunnel. There is light. I have seen it over and over, and it takes working on it. It takes waking up everyday. Your life is worth living, always, always, always.
I wouldn’t have turned to music. I wouldn’t have turned to art, if it wasn’t for depression. It turned me to a pen and a paper in middle school when I felt lost, writing songs about being found. I would’ve never had music if it wasn’t for depression. It’s just part of my story. That’s it. It doesn’t define me.”- Dan Reynolds, lead singer of the band, ‘Imagine Dragons’
Source:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=euV43qeBhvQ